Exile
by beeftony
Summary: Ursa appeared before Azula as a phantom, a haunting spirit that brought a confession of love. Only it wasn't a ghost she saw.


Ursa shut the chamber door silently behind her, so that Azula would not realize that she hadn't actually seen a ghost. She had reached out and was rejected; Ursa doubted she could survive her daughter's wrath.

'_She's always taken after her father,_' the exiled royal mused as she retreated down the ornate halls. '_But it looks as if she's started to doubt him as well_.'

She would not even be here if her contact had not been so adamant that she attend to the situation personally. Ever since being compromised five years earlier, Ursa had preferred to observe and manipulate from behind the scenes. She was no puppet master, but she knew how to maneuver events in her favor. But this was no ordinary problem. Azula's recent banishing streak meant that a number of her contacts were being cast out of the palace, so even if she hadn't been concerned for her daughter's well-being, the threat this posed to her and the organization in terms of intelligence had forced her hand.

"Lady Ursa!"

She turned in the direction of the hushed whisper and saw the face of her contact. "What is it, Shyu?"

He moved in front of her. "Where are you going?"

"Away."

"Why? What happened with your daughter?"

"She didn't want to see me."

His eyes expanded quickly at the apparently unexpected news. Ursa herself had not been so surprised. "Why not?"

Ursa looked down. "The way she looked at me... She refused to believe I was real. I always suspected she blamed me for her problems, but I never dreamed that she actually _hated_ me."

Shyu only stared.

"You should have seen her. It's like she's falling apart... and she won't let anybody, least of all me, put her back together again—because she's doing it to herself."

Ursa chuckled so spitefully it bit her in the back of the throat. "She even broke her favorite mirror—the one her father had commissioned just for her, the one she used to spend hours in front of just staring at herself—just to get rid of me." She exhaled slowly. "It worked."

"But... you can't just run away!" He looked down. "Not again."

She raised her own head. "What would you have me do instead? Go back there and let her kill me just so she can prove to herself that I'm wrong? I'm not a firebender—and I couldn't face her even if I was. She's made her choice."

Shyu relented and looked up again. "I suppose she has. What happens now?"

"We wait for Zuko and his friend to come challenge her. I trust they are on their way here?"

"I received news of their departure earlier today," he answered, producing a letter. "They did not remain in Ba Sing Se for very long."

"Then they're almost here," she concluded as she scanned the paper and deposited it into her robes. "I should be going." She started moving past him.

"Before you go," he began, and she stopped. "There is just one thing I want to know."

She turned around. "What is it?"

"What really happened the night Fire Lord Azulon died?"

Ursa could not find the strength to look at him when she gave her answer. "I'm sure you've heard rumors."

"I have. They say you poisoned him. Is that true?"

"More or less."

Shyu stood there quietly.

She returned her gaze to him. "You didn't believe it, did you?"

He shook his head. "I never believed a family could be so divided as to be willing to murder each other. And I never thought a person such as you would be part of that family."

"That's the price you pay when you wield great power," Ursa replied. "You lose perspective."

"For your husband, perhaps. But that never happened to his brother."

Ursa smiled. "Iroh always made an effort to stay away from the Capital," she reminded him. "He would have been content to spend his entire life as a tea merchant. Even before his son died, he always viewed the war with an end in mind. Lu Ten's death only opened his eyes further."

She sighed. "I wasn't so lucky."

"You really killed him, then?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"He threatened Zuko," she answered calmly. "Mothers always protect their young."

"But why kill him? You knew you would be banished and separated from your family if you did. Why did you not just take them and run away?"

Ursa glanced back down the hallway. "Because there was more to it than that."

* * *

**Five Years Earlier**

She stood before the curtain. Fire Lord Azulon had retired from his throne room to meditate in his personal chambers, leaving the rest of the palace to settle into its nightly routine. She looked down at the object in her hand and momentarily lost herself in the way the swirling metal broke her reflection into a thousand tiny pieces of a fractured mosaic that would never be part of a congruent whole. Just as her identity had been torn into tatters and hidden behind so many masks she wasn't even certain her original essence remained among the scattered pieces.

It would all be over soon.

"Come in, Princess Ursa."

She started and stuffed the dagger quickly in her robe. How did he know? She stepped over the threshold and into the room.

"So," Azulon said from where he sat, legs tucked underneath his body, eyes sealed perfectly shut as he meditated behind a row of candles. "What did Azula tell you?"

The straightforward nature of the question puzzled her. Did he already know? Or did he merely suspect? "I do not understand," she replied, careful to keep her tone formal. "How would my daughter be expected to know about any of this?"

"She did a poor job hiding behind the curtains of my throne room," he answered, eyes still closed. "And I know Ozai fears me too much to bring you into this, even if he _is_ a coward."

Ursa sighed. "She told me you ordered my husband to kill his own son. _Our_ son."

Azulon opened his eyes. "And you have come to eliminate me in order to stop this from happening?"

"Yes." She revealed the dagger and pulled it from its sheath.

The Fire Lord cracked a smile. "The ruby-hilted dagger that Ozai gave you for your last birthday. Cold steel with Rat-Viper venom smelted directly into the blade. Kills quickly and silently, before the victim can report what has happened. A traitor's weapon."

"There's just one thing I don't understand," she said, returning the dagger to its sheath for a moment. "Why did you ask him to kill _Zuko_?"

"He is the first born," Azulon replied matter-of-factly.

"You and I both know that's not how he treats him," Ursa retorted. "If you _really_ wanted to punish him you'd have made him kill Azula."

He cocked an eyebrow. "Is _that_ what you want, then? You despise your own daughter that much?"

"I'll admit that her behavior sometimes gives me the urge to strangle her," she answered. "But every parent feels that way at some point. And that's _not_ what I meant."

"What _did_ you mean, then?"

"You're not punishing Ozai by ordering him to kill our son. As sick as it is, we _both_ know he'd eventually do it on his own anyway. You're testing him." She glared at the candles. "I just can't figure out what the test is."

She looked up when she heard clapping. "You are right," Azulon answered. "I _am_ testing him. Want to know how?"

Ursa nodded.

"Ozai has always lacked the courage to stand up to me. He thinks that if he plays the part of a good son and only opposes me behind my back, that he will somehow be rewarded. He is a coward."

"How can you call your own son that?"

Azulon smirked. "I know him. And I very much doubt he objected when you offered to remove me for him."

She glared. "I'm not doing this for him."

"Nevertheless, I only ordered him to kill Zuko to see if he had the will to oppose me. You presence here has given me my answer."

"And what answer is that?"

He continued to smirk. "I always suspected that he let you fight his battles for him. You order his servants, raise his children, and you are about to kill his father. All because he lacks the resolve to do any of it himself."

"They're _my_ children too," she insisted.

"Oh, I almost forgot—that is why you are here." He chuckled and produced a scroll.

"What is that?"

"My final decree," he answered, standing up. "My living will. It states that Ozai is to become my successor in the event of my death." He smiled wickedly. "But you will have to kill me to get it."

Ursa just stood there.

"What's wrong?" He began to walk around the candles, towards her. "It is what you came here to do anyway. And this way, _everybody_ gets what they want."

"Including you?"

He smirked again. "You are starting to figure it out, aren't you?"

"If I kill you, I'll be forced to leave," she began.

"That is the punishment for treason, yes."

"But Zuko will still be alive, and Ozai will take your place as Fire Lord."

"Of course."

"You sick, twisted _bastard_," she snarled, squeezing the dagger harder. "You set this up, didn't you? You wanted me gone so you waited for an opportunity and took advantage of it!"

"Ah, but is that so different from your _own_ motives?" he countered, still grinning.

Ursa froze. "How much do you know?"

Enough to know why you married my son," he answered. "I do not know where the orders came from, but I know that _love_ was not among your reasons."

She glared at him. "In case you've forgotten, our marriage was _arranged_."

"Yes... convenient, isn't it? I wonder who arranged it. _I_ most certainly did not."

"You gave your approval in any case."

"Only because I did not understand your true loyalties back then. I still have not figured them out fully."

"And you never will." She drew out the dagger again.

Azulon closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.

"I have just one more question," she said, and he opened his eyes again. "Why didn't you kill _me_, if you knew who I was?"

"Because," he answered, smirking, "this is the only way my legacy can survive."

She chuckled bitterly. "I wonder what that says about your family."

"You are a part of it too, you know."

"Yes," she agreed, plunging the dagger into his belly. "I suppose I am."

* * *

"So he just let you kill him?"

"Azulon only had a couple of years left in this world, contrary to all the propaganda assuring the citizens that he was in perfect health. He wanted to die on his own terms."

"And he arranged it so that you would be banished and his youngest son would rise to the throne?"

Ursa shook her head. "It wasn't as simple as that. Iroh's retreat from Ba Sing Se following Lu Ten's death provided the perfect opportunity for Ozai to make his appeal. He insisted that he was the perfect servant, and told his father to use him. Azulon thought he was too much of a conniving coward, so he pretended to be angry and ordered Ozai to sacrifice Zuko as punishment. Only it wasn't a punishment."

"It was a test."

"As I've already explained. Azulon knew that Ozai had a point about Iroh being suddenly unfit for the throne due to having no remaining heirs, and his wife had passed away years before that. But he didn't want to seem cruel by just taking away the only thing Iroh had left. So he had _us_ make the decision _for_ him."

"It is ironic that he would criticize his son for being so underhanded, only to resort to such methods himself," Shyu observed.

"It wasn't the scheming that bothered him," Ursa clarified. "It was that Ozai refused to endanger or even involve himself in anything unless he was absolutely certain he would win. He didn't see those as qualities befitting a Fire Lord. So he came up with the test in an effort to force those qualities out into the open, if they existed at all."

"How do you know all this?"

"Azula wasn't the only one listening in on Ozai and his father. It's why I didn't stop her from running off with Zuko." She smiled. "Also, I've had a long time to think about it."

"I see." Shyu sighed. "But what did _you_ have to do with any of this?"

"As Azulon pointed out, I was part of his family. Zuko needed somebody to protect him, and Ozai was more than happy to let me fight his battles. But the truth is..." She looked down. "I was taking advantage of an opportunity myself."

"What do you mean?"

"It's an even longer story than the one I just told you," she answered, peering over his shoulder. "And I have to be going before Azula comes looking for me." She turned around and, donning her hood, strode quietly away.

She had just disappeared around the corner at the end of the hall when a door suddenly slammed open and Princess Azula stormed out of her room. He looked back, wondering how Ursa had timed that.

"You!" He whipped his head around to see Azula almost charging towards him, a crazed expression on her face. "Why are you here? Why aren't you out in the courtyard with the other sages?"

He did not answer the question right away, too startled by her appearance to even hear what she was asking. Ursa had been right about her daughter falling to pieces, pushing away anybody who attempted to help. "Y-your hair..."

"What _about_ it?"

"N-nothing!" he shouted hastily, backing away. "Your hair looks perfect! Just like always!"

"_Good_," she replied in a tone that would have been sweet but for the horribly disguised malice behind it. Now answer my other question: _why_ are you in my palace, instead of the courtyard?"

"Th-there are more than five sages, you know. I was sent by the others to come get you." He hoped she would believe him.

"But there are at least five of them out there?"

He nodded.

"Well then, I don't see any reason for _you_ to be here," she determined, examining her talon-like nails. "You're banished."

"Yes, Princess Azula," he answered, bowing as he walked away. He did not exactly want to be around her at the moment anyway. He quickly changed direction and beat a hasty retreat.

"Wait."

Shyu froze, then turned around slowly. "Yes, Princess Azula?"

"First of all, just call me Fire Lord."

He nodded. "Of course."

"Second, have you seen a dark-haired woman in red robes walking down this hall?"

"Besides you?"

"Ha, _ha_," she deadpanned. "I'm talking about my _mother_, dimwit."

"Ursa? But she's been dead five years!"

Azula did not seem convinced. "Then why was she just in my room, talking to me?"

"Her spirit, perhaps?

"I'm not the _Avatar_, silly. There's no way I could have seen a spirit. Besides, Father said she was banished, not executed."

"Then I do not know what you saw," he said, looking down. "But you are the only one who did."

Azula shrugged. "Oh well. I'll find out sooner or later. You should probably get to work on being _banished_ now."

"Yes, Fire Lord," he answered, then quickly turned around and ran away.

As soon as he was out of sight, Azula narrowed her eyes.

"Liar."

* * *

The room was almost like a shrine. Servants had maintained its immaculate appearance every day for the last five years, preserving it perfectly. Light still filtered in thought the curtained windows, though the comet had given it an umber quality that bathed the scene with dreadful orange, in direct contrast to the silver moonlight that colored her last visit to the chamber. The room looked as though it might burst into flame at any minute, like the memories were only a single lick of flame away from vanishing completely.

She looked back at the door, the same one she had vanished through five years prior. Memories came to her unbidden, transporting her to a different place.

"_Everything I've done, I've done to protect you,"_ she heard her own voice say. _"Remember this, Zuko: no matter how much things seem to change, _never_ forget who you are."_

Ursa closed her eyes and sighed. That was not the truth. It was a lie told to protect a child who had done nothing to deserve the burden he had inherited. An oversimplified explanation of the means by which she had saved his life. It was meant to render his loss easier to bear.

But it was still a lie.

"Zuko… forgive me," she whispered softly. A great sadness overtook her, but Ursa did not cry. That was not what she had come here to do. She sat down at the small desk next to the bed and started to compose a message.

It started with her crown. Ursa slid out the pin holding it in place, then slowly removed both the flame-shaped crown and the ring to which it was attached, allowing her hair to fall. She placed it on the desk.

Next she produced a ruby-hilted dagger, the one with which she had ended Fire Lord Azulon's life, and placed it directly beneath the crown. There was an inscription on the sheath which read: "Victory at any cost."

She stood up. Reaching into her robe, she produced a small, seemingly unremarkable Pai Sho tile. She placed it beneath the crown and dagger.

Her signature.

The tile had emblazoned on it a solitary symbol, one that few still recognized. It was a symbol of beauty, but its color hinted at a darker nature that most people did not stop to think about. It was the color of death.

It was also the only way that Ursa could be sure that her message was understood. She knew Zuko had seen the symbol, and even though he did not understand its full meaning, he would know that anybody using it was a friend.

Satisfied that Zuko would at least know she was alive, Ursa turned around and donned her hood, then left, just as she had five years earlier.

Only this time, it was to a brighter future.

**The End

* * *

**

Author's Notes: Fun fact: this was actually the first story that I typed up when I began my resurgence all the way back in November of last year. It's been sitting on my hard drive for eleven months, waiting for a story that may never come. So, in order to tide you all over while I work on getting my other stories together, enjoy this.

This was supposed to tie into chapter four of "Where You Lead," the first ATLA story that I posted here. One could actually consider it a prequel to the duology I had planned, which would have examined Ursa's story and how that web of betrayal trickles down to Zuko and Azula. But alas, I became enamored with other ideas and that story may never see the light of day. I might come back to it should I by some miracle become interested in _Avatar_ again.

Thanks for reading!


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